TEACHING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE SKILLS
TO HELP PEOPLE THRIVE
REPLACE MISERY WITH HAPPINESS
I speak to audiences who need to learn how to replace misery with happiness. I teach them emotional intelligence skills to use daily that will enable them to elevate their own lives beyond existing, breathing and working.
I do this because my own experience as a Suicide Prevention Program Manager and modern research shows that we are lonelier and more miserable than we’ve ever been.
So many people are looking for help to transform their misery into a fulfilling, satisfying life because they don’t know how to do that for themselves. I teach them how. No more waiting for someone else to make you happy. You are in charge of your life. You deserve to be happy.
Charlson Gaines is a retired US Air Force disabled veteran. He served all over the world as an intelligence analyst including stints in Iraq, Afghanistan, Kosovo, Qatar and Korea.
During this time, he earned his Master’s Degree in Health Psychology and Behavioral Medicine. He is currently a Health Psychology Ph.D. candidate. He also spent four years as a DoD-Certified Sexual Assault Victim Advocate.
He fully embodies the US Air Force Core Values of Integrity, Service and Excellence. Upon retiring from the US Air Force, his career choices led him to earn a second Master’s Degree, this time in Project Management. With 20 years of military experience and two Master’s Degrees, he re-engaged with the military working in both the US Navy and US Air Force Sexual Assault Prevention and Response Headquarters.
Mr. Gaines then became a Violence and Suicide Prevention Program Manager. While in this position, he became a certified DoD Master Resilience Trainer and cognitive behavioral life coach. He also became a Certified Trauma Professional through the International Association of Trauma Professionals.
He has a unique combination of skills, education and experience that led him to integrate emotional intelligence and resilience into a system that not only prevents suicides, but teaches people to replace misery with happiness. He’s spoken at over 30 events to over 5,000 people.
His audiences have included US Southern Command, National Air and Space Intelligence Center, the 70th Intelligence, Surveillance and Reconnaissance Wing, members of the Chicago Teachers Union, and the 29th Annual Joint Safety and Environmental Professional Development Symposium hosted by the US Navy.
INTEGRITY SERVICE EXCELLENCE
SELF-AWARENESS AND EMOTION REGULATION
This talk is focused on getting people to better understand themselves. Self-awareness is a superpower that enables you to set boundaries, align your goals with your values, and take a truer perspective of your life on a macro level. When you understand what you feel, why you feel that way, and how you express those emotions, you are in a position to regulate those emotions. Regulating your emotions enables you to minimize chronic stress, stop the hyper self-criticism, and make decisions about your life based on who you really are, not the judgment you’ve unfairly levied on yourself.
Empathy is the most critical leadership skill. Empathy enables leaders to build teams of people who buy into each other, are more engaged, and are enthusiastic about being a part of that team. Empathetic leaders cultivate cultures of commitment, success, and camaraderie that can’t be built with technical skills, data analysis and staff meetings. Empathy is the magic to push your team over the tipping point from meeting standards to thriving. If you want your colleagues and employees to match your commitment and engagement, you need to employ empathy.
EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE, BURNOUT AND SELF-CARE
Self-awareness and emotion regulation help people recognize signs of burnout within themselves. Empathy enables leaders to recognize burnout within others. Recognizing the signs of burnout and knowing your team allows you to replace burnout with engagement, enthusiasm and teamwork. However, when people are burned out, they can often become depressed and disengaged. This talk allows you to recognize what burnout is, differentiate between burnout and depression, and proactively employ self-care measures to prevent burnout from devastating you and your team.
USAF J2/CC, HQ U.S. SOUTHERN COMMAND
“Greetings from United States Southern Command.
On 25 Jun, Mr. Charlson Gaines graciously joined one of our J2 Air Force All Call events and provided outstanding and impactful training to our Airmen. Mr. Gaines’ training was incredibly timely and verifiably resonated with multiple Airmen based on phone calls and conversations that the All Call moderator received. On behalf of the J2 Airmen here at United States Southern Command, please extend my deepest appreciation and a job well done to Mr. Gaines.”